overcoming #@$@#%!

It was fun, i started off with no hope of carrying out a decent meaningful conversation, but it wasnt meant to be that simple. We talked, i thought it was fun, you undermined my only reason for living, corrupted my dreams and soon i stopped dreaming without even realizing it. I had turned into everything i hated about people, my persona of evil. I talked of things i didnt think i was capable of even listening to.
Little by little my insides rotted, still unaware of the apparently indelible change. As always the realization dawns a little late and it seems too late to revert the numbness that has taken over. Benumbed from head to toe, the change may be too discomforting for my comfort. The lack of sensation, far from gratifying(as i once believed it would be) but complacent enough to deter change will be the end of me.

friends

Why did it take me so long to realize this? Even now, can i be absolutely certain?
Looking into the mirror at the face of the illusion, dark lines streaked across the wall, the light illuminates, at the same time casting shadows over the chaste plains.

I have never been quite sure about who my friends were or if i had any at all. I dont mind most of the people i meet, its only my friends that i have a problem with. Once i start analysing them all the kirks become apparent, that coupled with their tendency to compete to prove their superiority over me annoys me to no extent(this wouldn't have mattered if they actually did have some grey matter inside that thick skull of theirs). But the problem is all my so called 'cool' friends fall into this category and now the people whom i wouldnt have looked twice at before are beginning to seem cool, they accept that i'm smart and are ready to listen to the things i want to say and dont just write me off as some arrogant, narcissistic, conceited ass.

Everybody has a cool side to them and one should be smart enough to recognize that in others and just accept them for who they are....